2014 – The Year that Changed Everything

Divorce is never easy.

Never

Due to my own actions, I found myself realizing this in a huge way.

Notice those words….. my own actions.

When I decided to put my own needs before others in 2014, and acted on it, and then lied to everyone I knew, I put into motion the spiral that resulted in my divorce. I can give all of the excuses in the world: That I wasn’t happy. We were incompatible. We were from different worlds. That what we had wasn’t a good marriage. But they are all excuses.

I reaped what I sowed in a major way and am still reaping today. Finances plague me. I lost many friendships that have never been renewed. I lost my church and the trust of the people there and still struggle with that today. I entered another relationship way too soon and put my children through another roller coaster of emotions when that ended.

BUT GOD WAS NOT DONE WITH ME,

I struggled with whether I had ran too far from who God wanted me to be. I struggled with whether the sin of divorce, emotional infidelity, lying to my friends and family, and walking away from ministry had disqualified me from serving God. I had felt called from the age of 18 – was He done with me? Did what I do cause the ministry I had been a part of the previous 16 years to be worthless?

No.

1 Timothy 1:9 says ^“who saved us and called us to a holy calling, not because of our works but because of his own purpose and grace, which he gave us in Christ Jesus before the ages began.”   It wasn’t my works which began my calling in ministry, and my works cannot take that calling away. I am called because of God’s purpose and grace, and His purpose doesn’t change.

So, I have been and will continue to take up that calling. I accept the forgiveness and grace that God offers with all that I am. I will do all I can to use the gifts God has given me to point others to Him. I’ve been blessed to now be in a relationship with a wonderful woman who encourages me and strengthens me every day, and for the first time I think I am ready to receive that encouragement, I wasn’t ready in my marriage or previous relationship. But I am now.

I’m done using my voice to sing and bring glory to myself. I’m done hiding and begging forgiveness for acts that I have already been forgiven for. God wants me to and requires me to make an impact in this world for Him.

Are you there? Have you felt those same things? Have you felt defeated and like what you’ve done has removed you so far from Him that you can’t get back?

My friend, God still loves you as much as He ever did. He still died for your sins; past, present, and future. He still wants good things for you and wants you to live an extraordinary life. And He wants you to love others and bring them to Him. Bring as many with you into His embrace as you can.

I’m forgiven. I’m called. I am a child of God.

I hope you realize that you are too.

 

~ by denniscraig on August 1, 2018.